Are you asking yourself how not to waste your life? You have to make the most of your life!
Last time you had the opportunity to learn how to motivate yourself better. But at the same time, it is necessary to really enjoy life.
Some people have more than enough motivation, and they just thoughtlessly pursue their dreams without experiencing joy. So today you can learn more about how to change your mindset to make your inner motivation effective without you burning out and feeling frustrated.
Today’s society is strongly focused on results and not on the process that leads to these results. Ideally, we want everything now.
This widespread perception hurts people a lot, forcing them to move from goal to goal and never to be happy with what they have. There is always something more we can achieve, a better car, a bigger house, nicer and younger partner, higher earnings. Basically, we never have enough.
It is also the result of our ability to quickly adapt that our brain is capable of. Previously, the ability to adapt was crucial to survival; today it can complicate life.
How to avoid the effects of the adaptation?
First of all, if you don’t want to waste your life, you need to completely change your point of view and perception.
The way we perceive and think about things fundamentally affects our lives.
For sure you know the example of someone seeing a glass half full and someone seeing the same glass half empty. If you think about this example, the real fact is that water fills half the glass.
One person perceives the empty half of the glass, and interprets the situation as “half empty”. The other emphasizes the part of the glass that is still full and interprets the situation as “half-full”.
Why is it so crucial how you perceive whether the glass is half full or half-empty? Because the way we interpret the situation — which is still the same — affects the feelings we have from that situation.
If you see the glass as half full, you feel good that you have half left and you don’t feel scarce. But if you see the glass half empty, you feel that the water is diminishing, you feel scarce, and you feel bad.
Think about it again – the initial situation is the same, but one person has bad feelings and the other one feels good.
One of the answers to the question of how not to waste life is to perceive the glass as half full! 🙂
How can this be used in real life?
Thus, the brain is able to evaluate the same situation in two or more different ways. This awareness is essential because now you can start exploring how you perceive things and situations in your life and try to see them from a different perspective.
Let’s continue the question of how not to waste life and truly enjoy it, not just blindly chase our dreams to a burnout.
Now you know that you can change the way you perceive situations and people and how you feel about them. If you want to be happy, you’ll have to learn to perceive your dreams and goals from a different perspective.
People often have such a mindset that they cannot be happy until they reach a given goal or dream. They experience their days full of discontent and frustration that they drive an old car instead of a new one. That they live in an ugly apartment instead of a beautiful one. That they make little money instead of a lot.
People focus on what they don’t have instead of what they have.
This is a fundamental mistake many people do and waste that way their life! Because with the power of their thoughts they only attract more dissatisfaction to their life. We will discuss how the thoughts impact our lives in detail later on.
People have forgotten how to be happy right now, and they have many conditions for their happiness.
There are many conditions that we limit our happiness with.
I will only be happy if I have a red car. Only if the boss is nice to me, only if this friend apologizes to me. Only when my child goes to college. I will only be happy if I have a great partner, only when he or she listens to me …
In many cases, the problem is not only that you condition your happiness, but also that your own hapiness depends on someone else. Someone you aren’t able to control – though we often try to. 🙂
Once someone does not behave according to our expectations, we are unhappy and we blame him. Why do we voluntarily pass control of our happiness into someone else’s hands?
Another mistake that we often do, when it comes to our happiness, is that we wait for the perfect moment to finally start to be happy.
People wait to be happy and continue to find more and more conditions for their happiness. These people say “I’ll be happy, when….”
I will be happy when… I get to college, when I find a partner, when we finish the house, when we marry, when we have a baby, when the baby grows up and falls out of the house, when I divorce, when I retire…
If you’re still waiting for something like this, you’ll probably never be happy. At the end of your life, you look back and bang your head for missing your whole life waiting for something, instead of enjoying each and every moment for its own beauty.
The second answer to the question of not wasting your life is to learn to be happy now. Enjoy every day with everything that comes across your way.
And meanwhile, work on your dreams and goals. But with the right mindset and especially the right kind of motivation.
In the last article, we were discussing the topic of internal motivation and why is it better than external motivation.
It’s great to have any kind of internal motivation. Having your dreams and goals that you can work on and that drive you forward.
However, there is one especially effective form of internal motivation that combines dreams and goals, while avoiding adaptation, frustration, and burn-out.
It is a form of motivation where you are not motivated by the achievement of certain goals, but by the life journey.
How does it work?
In the last article, a number of questions should have inspired you to create a vision of your life.
You were supposed to create a picture of not only your lifestyle, as an idea of where you want to live, the partner you want to share life with, the hobbies you want to pursue. But above all, you should make clear what you want to invest your life into.
Each of us needs something to dedicate life to. None of us has been sent with a specific mission, nor does life itself have any specific meaning.
The only purpose of life is to enjoy life, explore it in all its aspects and diversity, and spend your time with something that makes sense to you personally.
If you live for your vision, you will be much happier than if you lived to achieve your goals.
Motivation by goals versus motivation by the life journey
The difference is that in achieving goals you are happy only when you reach the goal and shortly after you’ve reached it. Then the brain adapts to the goal and happiness fades. But if you live to fulfill your vision, you can be happy every day. Because fulfilling a vision is a lifelong journey.
You can set certain milestones for your life journey that you would like to achieve. With the help of milestones, you will confirm that you are still on the right track and walking in the right direction. The difference between a milestone and a goal is that you fulfill the goal for itself, but a milestone is only an indicator that you are on the right track.
Fulfilling your vision satisfies you because you do activities that you enjoy. And if you happen to have activities that do not enjoy you so much, you have at least a good reason to persist and do them anyway.
Not everyone knows what to do with his life
I often find that people in their twenties, thirty, forty or even fifty years have no clear idea of what they want to invest their lives into.
There are people who, from elementary or high school, know that they want to be doctors, artists, lawyers, IT specialists, carpenters and so on.
But many of us do not have such a clear idea. And so in our lives, we follow what looks profitable or what our parents advise. We do not know how to discover hidden talents in ourselves, how to create our vision. In many cases, we do not even know that we should create one.
However, if you discover in yourself what really matters to you and start working on it, you will see that your life will be completely overwhelmed with joy and a sense of meaningfulness.
If you’re wondering what you should do and want to find out in yourself, the next article is for you.
Summary: How not to waste your life?
- focus on process, not result
- perceive the situation from a more positive perspective
- learn to be happy now and don’t wait for perfect conditions
- find in your life what you enjoy and devote yourself to it